If you're interested in arranging a school visit or other author event, please use our convenient contact form to get in touch with Melinda for information on pricing and availability.
Can't wait for Melinda's next book? Maybe a story will tide you over! Here's one just for you — check back often for freshly-spun tales!
When Pigs Are Left Alone
©2005 by Melinda Long
When pigs are left alone and there’s no one there to see, they stop all that rolling-around-in-the-mud-nonsense,
and put on well-pressed tuxedos. They eat dainty bits of cheese and sip ginger ale from tall-stemmed glasses.
And grunts, of course, are simply not allowed,
when pigs are left alone.
I’m not making this up! Really!
When dogs are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they never walk around with their tongues hanging out.
Instead, they put on dark glasses and secret agent clothes,
and go sleuthing around the globe saving the world from bad guys.
And drinking from the toilet is considered to be in very poor taste,
when dogs are left alone.
It’s true.
When monkeys are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they put a halt to all that swinging from vine to vine silliness,
and slip on tall chefs’ hats and aprons,
and compete to see who can make the lightest soufflés and the creamiest cream puffs.
And eating fleas from other monkey’s heads is frowned upon, when monkeys are left alone.
Can you believe it?
When horses are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they do not wander aimlessly around the pasture munching on grass and oats.
Instead, they drag out their shorts, tennis shoes and headbands,
and organize classes in low-impact aerobics, kick-boxing, and weightlifting,
And swatting at flies with their tails would naturally be rude,
when horses are left alone.
Honest!
When house cats are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they avoid those sissy catnip toys altogether,
and sit around in sweat pants,
watching ice hockey, wrestling, and football on TV.
Pawing at a ball of yarn would just not be cool,
when house cats are left alone.
Seriously!
When turtles are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they slide right out of those shells,
and dance around in the grass to the beat of mambo music,
while turtle bands play conga drums.
And slow-poking around like a snail would be very dull indeed,
when turtles are left alone.
I’m not joking here.
When ducks are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they hush all their quacking and begging for bread crumbs,
and they fumble all around the pond with eyes closed, playing Marco Polo, Marco Polo with the geese.
And only those with no self-respect would poke their heads in the water with their tail feathers sticking out, when ducks are left alone.
No kidding!
When crocodiles are left alone and there’s no one there to see, they cover up those frightful teeth,
and sit around the campfire singing camp songs,
and telling scary people stories that happened to somebody they used to know.
They would never even think of lurking about in swamps with only their eyeballs and nostrils showing,
when crocodiles are left alone.
Amazing!
When animals are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they gather together to lounge about in bean bag chairs,
drinking warm cocoa as they think about, and ponder,
what exactly people do when we are left alone.
You probably wouldn’t believe all the crazy things they dream up,
when animals are left alone.
But then again, maybe you would.
For another story by Melinda, click here.All illustrations copyright ©2003 David Shannon. Published by Harcourt, Inc. and reproduced with permission. All rights reserved.
©2005 by Melinda Long
When pigs are left alone and there’s no one there to see, they stop all that rolling-around-in-the-mud-nonsense,
and put on well-pressed tuxedos. They eat dainty bits of cheese and sip ginger ale from tall-stemmed glasses.
And grunts, of course, are simply not allowed,
when pigs are left alone.
I’m not making this up! Really!
When dogs are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they never walk around with their tongues hanging out.
Instead, they put on dark glasses and secret agent clothes,
and go sleuthing around the globe saving the world from bad guys.
And drinking from the toilet is considered to be in very poor taste,
when dogs are left alone.
It’s true.
When monkeys are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they put a halt to all that swinging from vine to vine silliness,
and slip on tall chefs’ hats and aprons,
and compete to see who can make the lightest soufflés and the creamiest cream puffs.
And eating fleas from other monkey’s heads is frowned upon, when monkeys are left alone.
Can you believe it?
When horses are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they do not wander aimlessly around the pasture munching on grass and oats.
Instead, they drag out their shorts, tennis shoes and headbands,
and organize classes in low-impact aerobics, kick-boxing, and weightlifting,
And swatting at flies with their tails would naturally be rude,
when horses are left alone.
Honest!
When house cats are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they avoid those sissy catnip toys altogether,
and sit around in sweat pants,
watching ice hockey, wrestling, and football on TV.
Pawing at a ball of yarn would just not be cool,
when house cats are left alone.
Seriously!
When turtles are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they slide right out of those shells,
and dance around in the grass to the beat of mambo music,
while turtle bands play conga drums.
And slow-poking around like a snail would be very dull indeed,
when turtles are left alone.
I’m not joking here.
When ducks are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they hush all their quacking and begging for bread crumbs,
and they fumble all around the pond with eyes closed, playing Marco Polo, Marco Polo with the geese.
And only those with no self-respect would poke their heads in the water with their tail feathers sticking out, when ducks are left alone.
No kidding!
When crocodiles are left alone and there’s no one there to see, they cover up those frightful teeth,
and sit around the campfire singing camp songs,
and telling scary people stories that happened to somebody they used to know.
They would never even think of lurking about in swamps with only their eyeballs and nostrils showing,
when crocodiles are left alone.
Amazing!
When animals are left alone and there’s no one there to see,
they gather together to lounge about in bean bag chairs,
drinking warm cocoa as they think about, and ponder,
what exactly people do when we are left alone.
You probably wouldn’t believe all the crazy things they dream up,
when animals are left alone.
But then again, maybe you would.
For another story by Melinda, click here.All illustrations copyright ©2003 David Shannon. Published by Harcourt, Inc. and reproduced with permission. All rights reserved.